Has anyone ever said “no” to you? Did they ever try to convince you that you were not going to be able to achieve one of your goals? How did you feel? Did their doubt in your ability serve as a motivator for you to jump into action?
I see this happen often when someone is being interviewed after achieving something great. Oftentimes, they will thank all the people that ever said “no” to them. They will talk about how hearing the word “no” helped them find the motivation to drive on against all odds in order to prove them and all other doubters wrong.
Are you one of those people? Do you jump into action just to prove people wrong when they tell you that you can’t do something?
Some people will tell you “no” because they doubt their own ability. Deep down in their hearts, what doubters are really afraid of, is you reaching your goal and leaving them behind. There is nothing more elevating than achieving the goals you set for yourself. Confidence, experience, and strength grow exponentially for achievers. However, motivation by itself is limited and at times dangerous. In all of my presentations, I make it clear that I am not a Motivational Speaker, I am an Inspirational Speaker. Motivation is temporary, but inspiration is permanent. If you are inspired, you will be motivated. (If you are motivated, you are not always inspired.)
On the other side of this equation are the people around you who love you, believe in you, inspire you, and support you no matter what you want to do. The people who believe in you are the ones who will help dust you off when you fall. They will always cheer you on and encourage you to keep going even when you might want to throw in the towel.
Would you rather be motivated by fear or inspired by love? Would you rather prove right the people that love you or prove wrong the doubters? Would you rather hear, “I am proud of you because I knew you could do it” from someone who loves you? Or would you rather hear “You got lucky that time, bet you can’t do it again” by someone who doubts you?
Throughout my life there have always been people who tried to tell me what I can’t do. (I can’t tell you any of their names because I have no idea who they were or where they are.) Instead, I have always focused on the words of my father the moment we arrived in this country. I had not seen him in four years, because that is how long it took him to save enough money to send for us. I will never forget standing at Newark International Airport as a kid and my father leaning down to me and saying “Mijo (“my son” in Spanish), you are in America now. They call this ‘The Land of Opportunity’. You can become anything you want here. You can make all your dreams come true if you believe hard enough.”
It was easy to believe him because he loves me – and people who love you speak from the heart; they speak from truth; and they are unselfish about what they want for you.
Want to live a more inspired life? Do this:
1. Understand that in this life or the next, you have nothing to prove to anyone! People who love you don’t need to be proved right. They already love you the way you are. I don’t set out to prove my father right, it just happens.
2. Make a list of all the people who believe in you and love you. Pick up the phone and tell them what their support has meant to you. Start with your parents.
3. Don’t hate doubters. Don’t rub their nose in it – instead, help them catch up by showing them how they can achieve one of their goals.
4. Be inspiring to someone. The world does not need any more doubters. Act from love not fear.
Want to add to my list of how to live an inspired life? Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org and send me examples of who inspires you and why.
Eddy Mayen is a Gitomer Certified Speaker who delivers Jeffrey’s content in both English and Spanish to companies worldwide. He speaks on sales, customer loyalty, leadership, and personal development. To book Eddy Mayen for your next event, visit https://www.GitomerCertified.com or contact the friendly folks at Buy Gitomer via email or by calling 704-333-1112.
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